Aunty Julie,
I was friends with a girl last year and then it turned into a
relationship. We only went out for a month but I really liked this
girl. I thought she was the one – until one day, she told me she had
cheated on me with three guys in one weekend. She said she just kissed
them but I still broke up with her. Ever since I have quit dating and I
have a somewhat of a dislike for women and I really hate her.
I always think that all women are sluts and I know all aren’t but
every one I come in contact with turns out bad. Everyone tells me I’m
too young to give up(29) but I don’t care. Every woman makes me sick and
I don’t want to waste my sweetness and kindness on people who will
just hurt me! And no Im not gay!
Please write me back soon and tell me how I can get over her.
Jerry, Lagos
Dear Jerry,
Sounds like this girl really did a number on you! Your trust in
women has really been shattered but please remember that this is only
temporary. As we go through life, we have many bad experiences but each
one of these exists so that we can learn more about ourselves and the
type of people we want to be with.
So what if one girl hurts you! You might have thought she was the
one, but I guess she wasn’t! All that means is that the right one is
going to appear one day. If you isolate yourself, you will not be
available to meet her… and then what!
While you are getting over this, take really good care of yourself,
work on your pride and self-confidence, and keep your distance from
enmeshment with women in general. Treat girls only as friends and
companions but do not get emotionally involved. Believe it or not, one
day, your pain will leave you and the perfect girl will appear.
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